Not Cool

Dear people who work in the housing office:

If your website says that you can put yourself on the waiting list as soon as you have orders and then when you submit all of your paper work, it’s not cool to say that you cannot actually put your name on the list until you arrive at your next duty station.

It’s also not cool to tell some one over the phone that the wait time for a house is 50-90 days and then when they arrive at the housing office in person say it’s actually a one year wait.  I’m certainly not very good with the numbers, but I have never in my life confused 50-90 days with 365.

Didn’t your mamas tell you that lying isn’t nice?

I’m sure you’re all lovely people, but right now, I’m mad at you.


The Neurotic and (after November 20th) Homeless Housewife.


So, it looks like we’re living off post again, which makes me very unhappy.  I truly enjoyed living off post here in Virginia because we managed to find a great neighborhood and school for Caroline; I hope we can find the same in Hawaii.  It’s just really hard to search for a place to live when you’re 5,000 miles away.

Based on a search on Great Schools, we’ve narrowed down an area where the schools are decent and the commute won’t be terrible for Craig, which is half the battle.  The next part is finding a place to rent in a nice neighborhood with kids for Caroline to play with.  99% of the time I’m completely at peace with the fact that we have an only child, but that 1% of uncertainty rears its ugly head any time I have to worry about finding playmates for Caroline.  Granted, if we had more than one kid, they could fight all the time and it wouldn’t matter, so perhaps I’m worrying for nothing.

I don’t now.

But what I do know is that right now I’m mad, sad and overwhelmed.

In my heart of hearts I know that we’ll find the perfect place for us to live, but what’s really bugging me is that we’ve been promising Caroline for a long time that when we get to Hawaii we can get a cat.  Our current landlord doesn’t permit animals, but having them on base housing is usually no big deal.  Except, we’re not going to live on base and all of the rental houses I’ve looked at do not allow animals.  This totally breaks my heart; I hate disappointing Caroline.  She REALLY wanted to get a cat.  Of all the things to be upset about, this is the one that is really getting to me.

Not cool.

Not cool at all.


9 responses

  1. Ack! I can’t believe they gave y’all the run around like that! A year wait? Oh, that’s ugly. Really ugly! I’m crossing my fingers that it’s all resolved soon, that the perfect place lands in your laps, and that cats and playmates are included.

    We didn’t have much say in where we ended up here in Germany. They just said, “this is where you are living.” I’m sure that it won’t be that easy where we end up next.*

    • Up until moving here and now moving to Hawaii, we’ve had a really easy time getting housing, much like your situation. They were like, ‘we have this….do you want it?’ and we said yes. Easy peasy.
      Not anymore, though. Apparently it has to do with the grouping in which Craig’s rank falls; there are lots of soldiers within that group and not enough houses. Unless Craig gets promoted today (um, not gonna happen), we’re stuck with this. Bummer.

  2. I’m so sorry Alison! The housing situation really stinks! Especially the part about the cat! Sounds like a really overwhelming situation. ugh. Hoping you find a really beautiful place to live where Caroline will have some new friends.

    • Thanks, Carol. Any chance I can uproot our community and Gold’s and bring you all to Hawaii? Better yet, maybe I can figure out a way to bring Hawaii here?I’ll get to working on that …..

  3. Boo. I’m sorry 😦 On the plus side, Caroline is an amazing girl who will make too many friends for your house to hold I’m sure. Ill keep my fingers crossed for a nice landlord who allows cats! I mean come on, why not allow a sweet little kitty cat?!?!

  4. I just found your blog via Army Amy’s post about moving to Ft. Bliss. We’ve been stationed at Schofield for almost 2 years, and I can tell you that everyone I know who lives on post HATES it (including friends at AMR and Hickam) and everyone who lives off post absolutely LOVES it. It’s crazy the huge divide! We live off post (Ewa Beach) and couldn’t be happier that we do. We have neighbors from all walks of life, not just military families (though we have those too), and it gives us a chance to better understand and appreciate Hawaii and it’s unique culture. Also, if you get Schofield/Wheeler, they are a missssserable area of the island to live. If you don’t work, I’d recommend Ewa/Kapolei/Ko Olina/Makakilo or North Shore. If you do work, live in Honolulu. Traffic really is worse here than anywhere in the nation. I commute to Honolulu daily and it’s hell (and I’m a born and raised Northern VA girl! So yes, it is soooo much worse than the DC area).
    Also, we have two 80 lb dogs and while it was a struggle to find a house to rent, we did eventually. Just keep looking via the military rental networks ( seems to have the most signs in our neighborhood) and craigslist.
    One last thing- one of my best friends here teaches at Kapolei Elementary and absolutely LOVES it. She raves about what a great school it is. Also, I work in child nutrition and we do reviews of the school districts meals to ensure their compliance with USDA regulations. Hawaii is regularly rated one of the tops states for their school meals. Literally everything here is made from scratch, they don’t use processed foods! They fresh bake all their baked goods And it’s incredibly tasty.
    I hope you love it here as much as we do!!:)

    • Oh wow, thanks for your reply, Alexis. We lived on Schofield from 1998-2001. We were young and childless and my husband worked at Kunia, so it was really convenient. This time around we have an almost 11 year old and he’ll be at Fort Shafter. Originally I wanted to live on post because it’s instant community and since we have an only child, it’s easy to meet new friends. We first focused on Mililani because the schools are good, but it’s hard to find a NICE house that allows pets. So, we’ve shifted to Ewa Beach. Craig has looked at a few homes and he likes the area…hopefully we’ll find the right one soon. I know a lot of military folks end up in Ewa, so hopefully it will provide the sense of ‘community’ I’m searching for. We’ve been glued to for days, but it’s pretty hard to come to a decision when we’re so far apart. We’ll find something soon.

      Thank you for all the information! I surely appreciate it. Hopefully our daughter will appreciate the scratch made school lunches!

      • If the amount of kids who came by trick or treating on Wednesday (it was insane, I ran out of candy within 40 minutes!) is any indication, Ewa Beach will be a great place for her:) I grew up military as well and know how difficult it is to move all the time. But Ewa/Kapolei are super kid friendly and popular with the military. As a young, childless couple, I wish we lived downtown haha!

  5. Thanks, Alexis; that’s good to know. I was just thinking how much easier it is to find a place to live when you don’t have to worry about schools and neighborhoods and soccer clubs and friends. In fact, I was also just thinking how cool it would be to live downtown in a condo on the beach. Likewise, I dream of someday owning a gorgeous townhouse in Old Town, Alexandria. But dream time is over….it’s time to face reality. My husband is meeting with David Kucic, the realtor, today. Hopefully the end is in sight!


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